Not dating people with kids
I’ve said before that partner priority relationships is where I’m at. Now I know it’s not always that black and white and some men really do have their shit together and can balance their lives, but that’s the exception to the rule. They are also more affectionate from what I’ve experienced. That’s when I decided that this probably isn’t for me. I don’t hate kids, I love kids, I just don’t want to deal that’s all. I do date men with kids over 18 though, they don’t really need their parents as much. I rarely go there so don’t ask and please don’t get offended. Dating men with kids takes someone very selfless and someone who is good at compromising her precious partner time. So, in order to avoid those problems, dating men with kids is something I don’t do. They are usually more mature and responsible and have their shit together because they have to. There are some amazing men out there with some great kids I’m sure of it. What happens is that inevitably I get put aside for one reason or another, all good reasons. I want to be able to be with my partner when it feels right. But, I would rather limit my choices than settle for something that I know won’t make me happy. Someone else’s kids shouldn’t be my responsibility. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with it, I’m just saying it’s not my first choice. We like what we like and it’s time to be proud of who we are and what we want. But this creates a conflict because a woman wants to feel secure and wanted in a relationship, but if she demands greater importance than his children, then she comes off as insensitive.Another big issue in this type of relationship is baby mama drama.Wait for them to come to you.”The advice came from my dear friend Jennifer, who has a stepfamily of her own and understands that it takes time and patience to blend and bond. Months later, in a quiet moment, I told the girls as much, and let them know it’s OK to have any range of feelings about all this. But life had gotten busy, and for a few days I was swiping right on Coffee Meets Bagel without my normal due diligence. Both seemed nice, but I was having trouble keeping them... Like a puppy dog, I wanted to cuddle up to them and play, but I remembered her advice not to overwhelm them, so I pretended like this was all no big deal, and tried to find the feline inside.But I thought I would add my perspective to this ongoing conversation.
My dad started living with my stepmother when I was really young and as I grew older I started resenting their relationship. Boy do guys get offended when I don’t go out with them because they have young children that are at the center of their lives! If it was a clean divorce/break up with no kids then she isn’t in the picture. I mean I always say never say never, because anything’s possible. I don’t mean to offend or exclude anyone but I just can’t do it. Don’t forget the mothers, you also have to deal with her too. Now, you never know, I might be proven wrong one day and meet an amazing guy with kids who his life in order. I viewed her as the evil woman that took my father away from me and my mom.If you date a man with kids, then you will inevitably be deemed the hated stepmother.